On the home front, things have been quite mixed. On the bright side, Erchi and Merry invited me to be a ringbearer for their wedding. Quite an ironic title, really, but there you have it. I feel incredibly honoured by that.
On the negative side, I'm still worried about Ham and Trotter. And there was quite a row at a family dinner yesterday. Frodo said some incredibly tasteless things to little Bilbo and Merry, and I wound up getting between them so Merry wouldn't pummel my brother. And Elanor said some very bitter things to Frodo before leaving for Lindon. Eru, knows I understand how she feels, but I also understand why he's so bitter to the children sometimes.
But it's disturbing to think that it was left to me to try to smooth things out, and not Samwise taking the initiative. Sometimes it seems like my brother is taking the heat for decisions that are as much Sam's as Frodo's, really, when you think about it. I do care deeply for Samwise, but it does get easier to not care for him quite so much that way when I think about these things. Let's see how I'm doing: here's that sheet of Samwise's icons. There, that one . . . nope, doesn't move me. And that one . . . no. And no. And that one . . . hmmm, no. This . . .oh my! No, I can be strong. Yes. And . . . oh dear! Ooohhh! I don't know quite what I would do if he ever looked at me that way, frankly . . .ummmm. Oh. Still a work in progress, I see. A cool bath would be nice right now, I suppose.